How Long oh Lord?

How Long oh Lord?
How long oh Lord, must I wait
Before I see the end of this dark night?
Before I can sleep a restful sleep?
Or before I can see the fruits of my labor?

How long oh Lord will it take
Till I’m free of these memories?
Till I’m able to see the light?
Or till I’m healed of these wounds?

How long oh Lord must I be
Crying out to you for salvation?

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Super Woman

Super Woman

I’m not Super Woman

I am barely hanging on

I am only doing what I have to do

Because any other path would be wrong


I don’t know how I manage it

Other then I have no option not to

If I don’t keep moving though the gamut

It’s do or die, and I refuse to stop


I am not stronger than anyone else is

In fact I’m weaker in a lot of ways

I am not some special wiz

Who has more power than the average


I am not Super Woman

I’m barely hanging on

It’s do or die, and I refuse to stop

I’m no different than the avarage

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Happy Anniversary

Happy Anniversary


Happy Anniversary he would say with a smile

My gut would fill with dread as he handed me my present

 I would fake excitement as I opened it up

“I bought them online at one of those novelty stores”

He would say as I stared at the brightly colored silicon


Later, after the sun had gone down

He would lay out my presents like a torturer’s tool kit

One by one he would try them all out

As I lay there pretending I enjoyed my gift

Artfully masking winces of pain with moans of pleasure


Not daring to give hint that I didn’t enjoy it

As he spent hours playing with his new toys

But he really didn’t care if I liked it or not

Since screams of “stop that hurts!” would be ignored

Or answered with “I saw it in a video, that girl liked it!”

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My Family

Part 2 of 3

My Family

 Then one day may Champion came to me

My knight in shining armor riding a dark horse

I have come to open your eyes so you can see

Was the opening line of His discourse


You are so steeped in these lies

That have been fed to you since birth

That it will take time to open your eyes

And make you see your worth


For this reason I am sending you a new Family

They will be My light in your dark world

When they embrace you, you will see

All the lies become unfurled


How will I know them? I asked with a tremble

How can I trust that they come from you

What if their lies are just more artful

And they are no better than my current crew


Bring your friends along with you, if you must

I will not force you to let go all at once

Over time they will gain your trust

And you will grow weary of your friend’s hindrance


You will know your new family by these names

Wisdom, Empathy, Grace, Truth, Justice, Mercy, Love, and Faith

They will work together and pull you from the flames

And they will reveal your friend as a wraith

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My Friends

This is part one of a trilogy I am working on.
My Friends

When I was little you came to me

You told me of all the burden I must bare

But that it was ok because in time I would see

That all of these burdens we would share


There were days when the weight felt light and easy

But there were days when I was crushed under them

You were always there to tell me you loved me

And that with your strength I could bare them


You taught me that in the chaos I needn’t be anxious

And that love was the duty to make them happy

You taught me that even though I was worthless

You would never abandon me


You taught me that abuse was par for the course

Because when they are angry love make me a punching bag

With Your help I could endure without remorse

I you wouldn’t abandon me like a used rag


Chaos, Worthlessness, and Abuse became my friends

They made me feel loved even though I was nothing

They told me that even though I was responsible for all of their sins

I can only show my love though my sacrificing

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Peace, peace when there is no peace

So you learn to live in chaos

Then one day the storm is over

But you’re still waiting for the next lightning bolt


How does one live on land

When they are used to turbulent water?

How does one be at rest

When they are used to being in a war zone?


So you start to rebuild your world around you

This time more sturdy and sound

You have learned how to survive a storm

Now you can stand in its eye

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I am worth less than a mothers love

I am worth less than understanding

I am worth less than time to understand

I am worth less than money to pay the bills

I am worth less then loyalty

I am worth less then fidelity

I am worth less then biting words untamed

I am worth less than the plate hurled at the wall

I am worth less than your collectables

I am worth less than your comfort

I am worth less than your health

I am worth less than your entertainment

I am worth less than common decency

I am worth less than your respect

I am worth less than your anger

I am worth less than your self-control

I am worth less than you

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